Three Words Can Change Everything…

by DanWolgemuth on September 27, 2024

They’re hard words. Selfless words. Honest words. But they grate against the very nature that we were born with.

Ironically, they are words that Jesus never uttered. He didn’t have to. Yet, He invites us to say them. He understands clearly that when we say these words they become a pathway to personal growth and increased relational trust and equity.

They are words that have fallen out of cultural favor. In fact, many would assert that these three words would prove to be political suicide. A death sentence to any aspiring candidate.

And so we avoid. We deflect. We defend. We endorse the outrageous. All to avoid saying the truth. All to support a pretense. All to protect our reputation, or the cause we have adopted as our identity.

Many people practice saying three beautiful words often throughout a day. “I love you.” To a spouse, to a family member, to a trusted and treasured friend. But I would contend that without the other three words, the beauty of “I love you” fades. It becomes nothing more than a fancy façade. A shine without substance.

These tough three words often get launched from our soul, but get stuck in our throat… because we wrongly assert that being “right” is more important than being honest. That the ends justify the means.

“I was wrong.”

There you have it. Three words that no political speech writer is plucking on their laptop. Three words that save ink for Hallmark. Three words that become the combination for unlocking a new level of intimacy and trust. Because they are true. Because they reflect vulnerability. Because they value relationship over ego.

“I was wrong.”

In expanded terms this means that I took a position, or made a claim, or announced a fact, or reacted in a certain way that was wrong. These three words can’t be paired with “but”, and can’t be followed by any other justification. If that happens, then whatever flame has been ignited by the confession, is extinguished in the rationalization.

The Bible doesn’t mince words here… “If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.” (1 John 1:8–10, ESV)

Integrity isn’t perfection. It’s an honest embrace of the truth.

“I love you”, without, “I was wrong”… creates a disconnect that ultimately makes love a shallow expression of temporary emotion.

Only Jesus could love without confession. Only Jesus could call out the self-righteous without complicity. Only Jesus could show us what perfect sacrificial love looks like.

“I was wrong.” This is not an invitation to shame, but a pathway to peace.

Before the beautiful, the honest. Before the tenderness, confession.

It may be poison on the campaign trail, but it’s essential if we want intimacy.

Three words can change a relationship… three words can soften a hardened heart… three words can open the door to love.

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